Its always one problem after another in this house with what we call Life. This morning I rose late 10.30, I had gone to bed just before 7am and having to take my liquid Morphine to ease the pain so that I could fall asleep. I was annoyed waking late, this is what the Morphine does so I try not to take it at night.
I was surprised when I heard the voice saying “hello” at my bedroom door, it was my eldest Son, I looked at him and asked the age old question “are you alright”, surprised he had come home from work. When Jonathan said “don’t get upset” thats the first thing I am going to do. “What’s wrong, are you alright” I said. “I didn’t want to worry you yesterday” said Jonathan “but I had some Chest pains, and I got them again at work”. I looked at him just shocked and so worried, he said that he had gone to the local Hospital who told him he should not have gone to them but phoned an Ambulance. Jonathan then went to the Doctors, had an ECG and the Dr told him he had to go to Colchester Hospital.
Jonathan came home to let his Brother and myself know, I said I would go to the Hospital with him but he said “no you stay there” and his Brother who had just gone to bed because he works throughout the night, wanted to go with him but again Jonathan said he would be fine.
We told him to ring us, email us, reverse phone charges. Jonathan rang after some time there to say that they had done another ECG and four blood tests, now he has to wait for the results. He is still getting the throbbing pain, but thank God has no pain down his arms. He still has the residue of a very bad chest infection he had for at least two months, I can’t help but feel this chest infection can be a problem.
The fact that on my late Father’s side there was a history of Heart Failure, which I was diagnosed with going on more than five years ago. On my Mother’s side there was Heart problems, and on my Sons Father’s Mother’s side there was Heart probs too. So we cannot take any chances. Just as there is Diabetes on both sides.
I have been so worried for some time now about Jonathan, and pray every night that he will listen to me if nothing else, he is in his Thirties not for me to interfere but advise I will if I feel that he needs help. My Sons are grown Men, and out of their own choice they live at Home, we are lucky to have a rather large house, so they have their own privacy their own rooms etc and really the only time we are together is Dinner.
Jonathan, unfortunately, started to put on weight, I said nothing but worried more and more as regards what he was eating. I cook healthy I have to, but my Sons do what they want as is their right. That is not to say I don’t worry, I do.
I know Jonathan works extremely hard, and is always far too willing (I guess its in us) and he walks to work and home again, but like my late Father a Grandad he never had. It is uncanny how he looks so like my Father he has his build too, so Jonathan began to put the weight on and on. It does not suit him and I have bitten my tongue, until those occasions when he was not well in particular the chest infection and I advised him to lose weight. I have been worried about his Diabetes too, I can’t make him listen to me I can only advise for his health.
When Jonathan rang from the Hospital I was pleased to hear him say that he is going to lose weight, he knows he’s overweight, that pleased me. But his main concern was for his job, as he had to leave one of the Women in Charge, his Boss had the day off, but Jonathan was so worried what she would say. Jonathan was taken ill, Hospital, Doctors and finally Colchester Hospital, he cannot help if he is taken ill.
Right now, I am concerned for my Son, he is still my Child regardless of his age. For me, old fashioned it may be, but once you are a Mother you are a Mother for life, not until they are 16 or 18, I am my Son’s Mother until I am no longer here. I feel strange when of late this year I find my Sons helping me more, and that does seem so very odd to me. I hope my Son will be able to come home tonight, I hope most of all they find no real problems. I pray for my Sons every night and I pray now that God will look after Jonathan.
Monday, July 10th I’ll remember this date.