I watch the clock avidly, then 3pm appears and as always going back to my childhood when I would be in the Church kneeling and praying for hours on end. I still stop what I am doing, not for hours, but for a short time I stop and go somewhere quiet where I can close my eyes and just remember and thank Jesus for the Sacrifice he made on this day Good Friday, and say my prayers – my prayers as I do every night.
Wherever I am I will stop, and I did it with my Children when they were young in the garden where they would be playing or in their bedrooms, I would call them and we would just stop what they were doing and they would say a prayer. Nowadays my eldest Son has chosen to be an Atheist, I cannot say I am all that happy about it, I find it sad that he does not Believe anymore, but it was his choice and its entirely up to him. My youngest Son is still a Believer and for that I am grateful.
I was Baptised and raised a Roman Catholic. but many years ago I stopped attending and believing in the Catholic Church, I have witnessed too much hypocrisy from my own family, ie mother/sister to last me a lifetime.
I may no longer belong to any Church but that does not mean I do not believe in God, I do I always have. Even though there were times in my life when I thought He had abandoned me, deep down I knew He was still there. When my Father died, I asked God “why” and I was angry. When my Husband was diagnosed with “Small Cell Cancer” and there was no hope for him, I got angry so angry with God, I remember one night I slammed our back door so much it nearly smashed the glass that is and I shouted at God why had He done this. Of Course God had not just as He had not abandoned me. He helped me get through the death of my Husband, the Funeral, and bringing up two young Boys on my own. it was tough at times but I never doubted that God was not there helping me.
I know very well there will be some non believers and those that will think I am mad to believe as I do. I know He is there, and even though I don’t know why I have to go through all I do, I know that at the end I will find the Peace I have never found on this earth.
Easter is a very special time, not just about going out for the day, for the Easter Eggs its the rebirth. Take a look around the Spring flowers that are there, the blossom tiny buds on the trees. It’s raining very hard here today, and some places have snow, but you can see Spring you can see all that God created.
When I was a child growing up in the 1950s the shops would close or those that did open only did so until 12 midday. Now they are open all day, in some cases 24 hours. There is so much greed, so much hatred around these days. Some people have little or no manners, its all me me me. I feel sorry for the children of today, its a hard World where violence plays a big part. There is no time for God in their lives. This Country, the United Kingdom, though at times its hardly united. This Country is a Christian Country and those of us who do believe we will never surrender that.
So today Good Friday I remember Jesus and His Sacrifice for us and on Easter Sunday I celebrate His rising from the Dead. I know God is always there for me, I hope your God is there for you too.